Thursday, February 08, 2007

Marcotte stays on with Edwards; Satan flummoxed

No doubt you’ve heard about the saga of liberal blogger Amanda Marcotte being hired by candidate John Edwards to manage his campaign blog.

Amanda Marcotte’s writing style varies in tone from the incendiary to the downright Hiroshimian. She has an elegant style and vocabulary no doubt inspired by sundry hip hop artists, comment threads on pornographic forums, and Bradley Dingledorf, the pimply, smelly guy who scrawled graffiti on her seventh-grade locker.

Behold this gem of literary fortitude:

“Q: What if Mary had taken Plan B after the Lord filled her with his hot, white, sticky Holy Spirit?

A: You’d have to justify your misogyny with another ancient mythology.”

Convinced that Marcott’s treatise on The Third Person of the Trinity as Human Spermatozoa was merely misunderstood, nuanced satire rather than adolescent brain spew, Edwards said this, defending his decision to retain Marcotte:

“I've talked to Amanda and Melissa; they have both assured me that it was never their intention to malign anyone's faith, and I take them at their word.”

Indeed, rumor has it that the Maligning Bar has been set so high, Satan himself is having a hard time clearing it.

UPDATE: Just for the record, I could care less if John Edwards keeps Marcotte on or not. The fact that her reputation is blighted by vulgarity on a cosmic scale is his misfortune and none of my own. As vile as I think her comments are, I'd rather her come right out and say "f*** you!" than insult my intelligence by feigning innocence about her intentions. Plus, I wouldn't vote for Edwards anyway, but I'd rather the electorate see whose company he's keeping.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Turn your radio on, and listen to the t'storms in the air ...

In the wake of 20 tornado deaths in Florida, the folks at my favorite weather blog -- the ABC 33/40 Weather Blog -- have issued another rant on the importance of weather radios.

I second that emotion.

Unfortunately, the "let the government take care of you" mentality has overridden common sense for a few people to the point that they'd rather get swept away like Dorothy than plunk down $20 for a basic weather radio. Scroll down to the first comment on that post and you'll see what I mean.

Granted, I'm a weather geek. I've gone through storm spotter training. I want my own wireless home weather station. But geekitude is not required for basic human survival.

Sometimes, people do all the right things and still get killed by tornadoes. In 1998, an F5 -- the most powerful type of tornado -- hit west of here and killed more than 30 people. A few were simply at ground zero and could have survived only if they'd had a basement or storm shelter. They did everything right and got into the most protected area of their homes, but the storm was too powerful.

But when I read about people in trailer parks getting killed, I want to scream. No one should EVER be in a mobile home during a tornado warning. NEVER EVER EVER. Drive to a gas station and hunker down in their bathroom. Go to a neighbor's house. Heck, crawling into a ditch is preferable to remaining in your own flying coffin.